Passion

Passion is an incredible thing. When we don't have it about something we can either not realise it, realise it and then forget, realise it and become apathetic/disheartened or realise it and do something about it. Tonight was a bit of a wake-up call in that area for me.

At the beginning of this year I knew I didn't have passion about life. About work. About much in general, especially direction. I knew that things were really good - but that they could be a lot better. As the year has gone on with its highs and lows, in the past few weeks especially, I've lost my passion to do something about it. To make sure that I'm on the right track.

I listened to three mindblowingly good bands tonight. Bands who were passionate about what they did, about life and about God. They had found something that made them buzz - but were very honest with the struggles of life. They were honest that they weren't perfect. That marriages struggled. That they need each other. That they had and continue to have tough times. That life sometimes sucked.

All three of the bands were "BIG" but they spoke with a bareness of the soul that was challenging and provoking. However, they brought hope and fun and life because they shared out of a place and through a medium that their passions and skills met.

Hearing and seeing people who had found where they fit for this section of their lives and were moving in that but staying honest and humble was a huge kick in the pants. What I knew at the beginning of the year hasn't changed, even though it has been covered up with leaves and debris - remnants of challenges. God has something more for me and as comfortable as life can be where I am... comfort doesn't inspire passion, all too often it inspires apathy.

I'm a bit aprehensive about moving forward, but that's also because I don't know what's ahead... I feel a bit alone in it all to tell the truth. However, that's also why I need to get away and know the comfort of the one who does know all things.

I also know though that the desires of my heart for family and love can confuse my thoughts and my prayer is that whatever decisions are made would be God honouring, God believing and God comforting - that is, that I wouldn't do anything out of Obligation, Guilt or a sense that I'd miss out on anything - but that in 20 years time I'd look back and have no regrets - regardless if I'm still single.

Passion. May it capture our hearts when we see it and remind us to examine our lives and hearts for what they have been called to do.